I had a time in my life when I lost my way. From my generally optimistic and can-do approach, I veered into a period where I doubted my ability and hid behind duties of family. It was a dark time. And it lasted too long.
What did I learn that I can pass along?
- Believe in my own ability to determine the direction I should head. I know myself best and while “an abundance of counselors” is important in making major decisions, my own instincts, honed and tethered, is my most solid source.
- If I am in an environment where virtually nothing I do is accepted, find another environment.
- If there is too much confusion, take time, maybe away from everything, to assess for myself. It is possible. Maybe for an hour. Maybe for a day. Once for me it was a weekend in a hotel suite with a pile of post-it notes and a flip chart. Time and space to think and sense will often part the clouds.
- Don’t let others determine for me my next steps of growth. Again, having others who have my best interest at heart can be a wonderful source of clarity. But, they are only seeing what I show them. There are steps I know about that may need to be taken first, before the steps obvious to others. I must be patient with myself….and intentional about the next step.
“You have to have confidence in your ability, and then be tough enough to follow through.” -Rosalynn Carter
I like that. I wish I had had that confidence in my abilities back in my 30’s and 40’s. But I do now. And I am grateful for the strength to look back and remember what I have learned without bitterness or anger.
I am willing to share those lessons with others now. It is a huge part of my life of encouragement and motivation. I need less from others than I once did. And I have a lot to give because of lessons and experiences. My third third is proving to be my favorite.